Saturday, February 26, 2005

To bed early, with knitting

I did get a lot done today - but not everything I needed to do. Good thing weekends last two days, isn't it?

I bought an optical mouse for my laptop, which is the cutest little thing and was amazingly cheap, and two movies, "Broadcast News" and "Fargo." Love 'em both, haven't seen Broadcast News in years.

Australian chardonnay. A little heavier than my usual cheap Eyetalian pinot grigio, but nice. I'm just more of a pinot grigio kinda gal, I think it's a climate/food thing.

Fresh flowers. But, oddly, though these were more expensive (though at Costco still a real bargain) and fancier, I am not that happy with them, and from now on I will stick to my cheap carnations.

Reading the Visioning book, and really getting into it. It obviously came into my life at the right time, because it is helping me focus on what I really want. Not wifty dreams of raising alpacas in the country (though that will quit being wifty damn fast if I hit the Lotto) but, what really makes me happy/content on a daily basis?

I like my job. I don't need a new career, I just need a new place to do what I already do.

An office with walls, management with a clue, and, well, this is about visioning, right? a fraction of a legal assistant to give me a hand, good pay, bonuses, and a copy/mailroom. It has been so many years since I had all of those things in one place. Wait, I'm not sure I ever had all of those things in one place, I have had all of those things at various times but never all at once. But I think now it is time to draw all the elements together into an actual functional employment situation. I am analyzing the elements that create some semblance of functionality. I know what to shop for.

Oh, and knitting-wise? I realized that I am holding onto most of my yarn stash out of guilt, because "I spent so much money on it" (amortized over a five+ year period since I returned to knitting obsessively, it's really not that bad) but now I have no burning desire to actually use it. I'm thinking I should make a second pass through it for a box or two or four to the Alderson Hospitality House. My life would be lighter and more free if I ditched a lot of the solid, sensible worsted, and stuff that just doesn't float my boat. Somebody else can use it. My life has changed, my stash needs to change with it. Tanks, shawls, socks, yarn for an afghan for my son (started in the hospital three years ago, stopped when I couldn't work on it in the bad lighting, time to start it again) there are things I really like to knit, and things I think I should be knitting but don't really want to. Time to hit the Stash Write-Off button and donate a bunch of it to charity.

I'm still on this slow, bumpy road to ditching what no longer works in my life. I'm starting to realize that this will go on forever, and there is no "there" to get to. And this is okay.

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