Sunday, November 15, 2009

Yes, Horoscope.

Now that you've actually been given a chance to sit back and relax, don't mess around. You're officially off duty now, so why not indulge in some serious leisure, with lots of good food, stupid movies and fun friends? And don't so much as lift a finger -- that's what your guests are for. Let someone else pick up the slack for once. You've been working your tail off and deserve total and complete relaxation.

Funny how I'd already decided to grant myself a weekend Off Duty before reading today's horoscope. I've had a personal epiphany, or hit the wall, or something, but this week I woke up and said the hell with all the pressure I put on myself. Bad enough I have a shitty, shitty dead-end job (I will not share the details of the week, because it would require reliving those feelings of disgust and frustration that I've managed to put behind me) and a house that is slowly and steadily eating the money I need for retirement, etc., etc., but I also put pressure on myself with TO DO lists, mostly involving said house from hell. I set deadlines that exist only in my own head, and then beat myself up for not single-handedly doing all the things I need to do in my "ample spare time" to meet the deadline I set for myself. I have more than enough to stress over in the day job, and I don't need my imaginary deadlines haunting me at home, too.

This life under constant pressure from without and within is of course damned unhealthy, particularly in my case. And I woke up this week to really see how I've been behaving - sleeping an average of only 6 hours at night, not exercising regularly, constantly feeling stressed, pressured, under the gun. I looked at all of this and realized that my current path was headed for another health crisis, and I think I've already dodged The Big One once. So I made myself a promise that I would change my ways, and I started yesterday.

Although the days still get plenty warm, the nights have cooled off to "sleeping with open windows" weather, which helps my sleep tremendously. I slept 8.5 hours Friday night, and yesterday was a gorgeous day. Murphy and I walked 3 miles while I listened to a good audiobook. I did the usual laundry, the usual basic cleaning, and went to the usual suspect stores (Target, Publix) and then it was 2 p.m. and I decided I hadn't been to Sip and Knit in a long, long time. The last time I was there, Tucker was a baby puppy! Now he's a dignified grownup dog, who greeted me with a wagging tail and impeccable manners. I didn't buy yarn, but I did buy two books: Leigh Radford's book of patterns for one skein of yarn (it has a baby bolero and baby hat that I must make for baby's home from the hospital ensemble, plus other cute little things) and the Interweave stitch guide - I think it's the 2nd volume - because I saw things in there I don't remember from BGW's books, and it's all written instructions, not charts I can't follow with my addled brain.

Then I went to Barnes and Noble and bought myself a couple more small presents - a knitting magazine I'd never seen before, all Jo Sharp summer patterns, very clean and classic and perfect for knitting for Girlchild, some new notebooks for scribbling, and a new mug for tea. They had a whole table of Vera Bradley stuff - I'm not a big VB fan as a rule, but this mug just caught my eye.

I love the colors, and the design. So I indulged myself. Because it was a day of indulging myself.

Of course, it's not all sunshine and walkies and shopping, because I came home from one of my outings late yesterday to find the outside faucet is frozen in place and has a steady drip, and when I tried to shut it off with a pair of pliers, the handle cracked. So today I will be calling my favorite plumbing outfit, the one that blessedly doesn't charge extra on Sundays, and see if a nice young man can't fix that thing for me, as a little more money drains out of my bank account. Sigh. This house hates me, I swear - it sensed that I was feeling relaxed and mellow, so it had to act out to get my attention.

But I will not focus on that. I will focus on feeling good.

When the weather turns cooler, Higgins decides he doesn't hate his roommates quite so much. They do provide warmth.


caroline said...

Sooooo glad you're indulging yourself. Movie?

Catherine said...

I got "27 Dresses" because it's supposed to be a good chick flick. It's not even a good knitting flick.