28 days from today, at 6:41 p.m., this household will have been loaded on a truck and be on its way to Asheville, and the dogs and I will be wandering the empty rooms (well, the dogs will be wandering; I'll be cleaning and stuff). We are officially at the Less Than a Month Countdown!
23 days until the wedding. 28 days until the moving van. Seriously. It's that close.
I have moments of sheer panic that I am, for the first time and in my SIXTH DECADE of life on this planet, just doing what the hell I really want to do - I am not being all goody-two-shoes worrying about everybody else first, and looking for the most "sensible" job in the "place I know best" (which has worked out so great so far, ahem). I am taking a flying leap of faith to do what I've felt was right for several years now. It feels so...crazy! Exciting! Scary! I wake up in the night at least 2x a week in a cold sweat, panicking about all the fun I'm having!!! AAAAARRRRGGGHH! :-)
Seriously, no regrets. Panic, yes. Of course. I'm not a nitwit and on paper, at my age and in this economy, this is an insane thing to do. But I did everything by the book for 30 years and...ended up here, ready to throw out the book. Fuck the book. I've colored inside the lines and was sooo cautious all my life, and it really wasn't worth it.
The weather is insanely beautiful, if really scary fire danger extreme drought dry. I am getting out and walking with my iPod on my head, and then doing a few more miles on the bike, just enjoying the crystal clear blue skies and random bird sightings - I saw the pileated woodpeckers the other day. Am somewhat amazed that in nearly 30 years in FL, I saw them for the first time in the last 2 years. I get a good workout in before 9 a.m., and then start with the friggin' boxes again. Made another run to the dump. I'm so weird - I enjoy taking stuff to the hazardous household waste recycling center. Yes, it's rather smelly, and there are many big garbage trucks, but it's a satisfying thing to do. Yes, I realize that my definition of enjoyable needs major work. That's why I'm moving.