Sunday, July 06, 2014

Facing Change and Seeking Inspiration.

I loved my four-day weekend SO much! Yesterday felt like Sunday to me, and I experienced a little thrill when I realized - I HAVE ANOTHER DAY! That day is now winding down, and it's back to the office tomorrow, to God Only Knows What Next.

I like to treat my birthday as a second new year, and the opportunity for a fresh start, a new journal, a new mission. (Mine works very well for this, falling only two days off the actual mid-point of the year, but any birthday works for this). The theme for my 57th year on the planet [holy shit I'm old] appears to be choosing itself: It's time to Get Serious about what the hell I'm doing with my life. I've been floating along for the last year or so, telling myself things are fine, while knowing they really are not, and in fact are in many ways really very not fine. My life is out of balance, and, at this stage in life, going along with the flow is not just wasting the time I have left, but dangerous to my future.

So lately I've started binge-reading "mid-life career change" guides for people in their 50s. [Midlife? How many 112 year old people have you met lately? "Midlife" is the new code word for "senior".] I'm also reading about frugal living and budgeting, via books borrowed on my Kindle - more about those another day.

One of the most respected and AARP-approved/endorsed books:

Life Reimagined: Discovering Your New Life Possibilities

There is a website with exercises to help focus on What's Next? And other guidance, and it's a very grounded and grown-up approach, no wishcraft involved. I'm only about a third of the way through the book, but already I'm identifying with the stories of people who, like me, are very good at their jobs, but just don't like what they do much. I am seeking a new inspiration, and a way to tweak what I know how to do to support me for the rest of my life. This is hard. I have a very basic problem that is common to people my age: I have a long resume in a particular industry, and while I'm very good at the things in my resume, I don't find it very fulfilling. But honestly, if you asked me point-blank what I would prefer to do (as "retire" is off the table for the foreseeable future)I don't have an answer.

The book recommends putting together a sounding board of people to bounce ideas off. I need a sounding board to bounce ideas at me.

Meanwhile, I will focus on my health, my energy, getting lots of rest, and daily yoga. I can't begin to describe how yoga in the morning energizes me and gets me out the door in a calm, grounded, postive frame of mind. Of course, this rarely survives past 10 a.m., but that just means I need meditation breaks during the day, right?


Anonymous said...

I'm thinking you have a good idea of what to do next. You've been circling around it for a while, getting closer all the time.

By the way, I never thanked you for the daily meditation idea. I found one I like, and it's a good focus when I get knocked off balance over the course of the day.


Catherine said...

I really don't have a good idea - what are you talking about? :-) Remember, it has to actually pay the mortgage!

Anonymous said...

I'm the one who said, "What about Asheville?" so obviously I don't have a clue. But you'll find "it" soon.