Saturday, February 21, 2015

I'm Exhausted.

But Murphy is still with us.  I intended to call the vet today and take him in for that final time, but...I just couldn't do it. They closed at noon, and noon just felt too damn early.  My instincts told me to wait and see how he did today.

After that awful night he made a series of small but steady improvements. I decided to throw caution to the winds with his diet - anything he eats is better than starving at this point - and he ate a little bit of scrambled egg (a forbidden food for years, because fat was the enemy).  A few minutes later, he got out of bed and went to the kitchen for a drink of water!  He was a little wobbly on his feet but walking on his own, doing something he thought of doing on his own, and he seemed quite alert and not in any pain.  Then of course he went back to his bed and laid there, staring, but he didn't seem miserable.

My daughter and Miss D came over to "visit Murphy" (say goodbye), and while they were visiting we all decided we were hungry, so I made a frozen pizza.  And this happened:

Excuse me, do I smell pizza?

He not only woke up, he got out of bed to demand pizza!  So of course, he had to have a few tiny bits of pizza crust to gum. He only wanted a few, and he was satisfied and went back to bed - I don't want to create the impression that he's in the midst of a wonderful recovery here.  But he clearly had enough spark in him to mostly enjoy his day. He hasn't pooped, and that's a concern, but his belly doesn't feel so taut, and I think the medication is helping settle the inflammation, or whatever's going on in there. 

We went for a short walk with Miss D, and Murphy mostly walked - I carried him when he resisted, but as soon as we passed the halfway point and were headed for home, suddenly he was walking normally, perfectly steady on  his feet.  Of course he came in and headed right back to his bed, but he had more energy and appeared to feel at least okay, which is more than I'd expected at 5 this morning. I just couldn't look into those alert little eyes and arrange to put and end to this.  He is still a very, very sick little boy, but he deserves a little more time, if he wants it. 

I'm utterly exhausted after pulling an all-nighter last night.. It's a quarter after six and I'm ready to fall asleep - I guess I'll be sleeping on the couch again tonight. We'll see what tomorrow brings. 


MKH said...

Best of luck to little Murphy! He'll let you know, and he seems happy! I do agree at this point just let him eat, certainly not everything but... Hope you get a little more time together!?!

KatyaR said...

Oh, Catherine, what a day you've had. I'm so happy to hear that he's better, even if just for a bit. I hope you can rest some tonight.

Anonymous said...

just enjoy every minute together- he's a tough little boy and i'm sure he has a few more lessons to teach you- i'm thinking about you from here in texas-


Karen said...

I'm so glad you're getting this time with Murphy!. He's a tough little guy!

Caroline said...

sending love and prayers, Catherine.

Joan said...

He IS a little booger, bless his heart! I hope you both get some good rest tonight.