Wednesday, August 26, 2015

The Cone of Uncertainty

It's hot, hot, hot, and I'm getting no exercise, and the work days are long. My junk mail keeps reminding me I'm old. Smithsonian just sent me an offer for a Senior Membership Rate! Senior?? Who are they calling a senior?? It was quite traumatizing! As I read the offer, numb with the shock of the insult of being called a senior to my face, sort of, I felt my rage cooling a bit...then...hey, wait, Smithsonian for EIGHT BUCKS a YEAR? Score! Sign Grandma up! I'm learning to embrace my senior-ness. I'm starting to get the discounts.

It's still slightly surreal. I have three granddaughters, the eldest of which is starting kindergarten next week. And Miss D is haranguing her mother to have another baby because she wants a little sister. (Explanations that you don't get to pick and it might be a little brother fall on deaf ears. And she's Delaney, so if she demands a sister, the Universe will probably provide.)

I'm not a brand new, "Oh you're too young to be a grandma!" grandma. Nope, I'm a grandma who gets "senior" subscription offers. This is a thing I'm still wrapping my brain around, with great difficulty.

My new replacement Kindle arrived, and it has a colorful print case I'm not likely to lose in the wash. I'm adjusting. They've made some changes to the format and things like "Collections" aren't where they used to be. I'm trying not to be a grumpy old lady about it.

I'm having a hard time not being grumpy about my job. The thing that was only going to be part of what I do now takes up the bulk of my day, while my core skills, yanno, the stuff I did for many years, are atrophying. I pointed this out to my boss, who is somehow not in charge of how I use my time. He's not happy about this either. Long story, but I have to either embrace this as my future, or find a way out.

And honestly, maybe I'm being an entitled bitch here. I am paid decently for what I'm doing, I like most of the people, the benefits are decent, it's all quite...decent. Adequate. The commute truly sucks and no, I didn't spend the last couple of decades preparing to do this, but it doesn't TOTALLY suck, really. I should shut up and be grateful that "at my age" I am so lucky! That's the common wisdom. At my age, I'm unemployable! Just ask the Internets!

But I put my resume online, didn't do any serious job searching, and yeah, the recruiter contacted me yesterday. I have an interview for that other job Friday morning. Let's review: I'm 57 years old, and I haven't had to actually search for a job since I finished college. So, should I let my core skills atrophy and embrace the job I have? I am grateful for what I have, I really am, but every time I even put a toe out, I get nibbles. I have to think I've been selling myself short all along. This interview is for a BIIIG company, not a mom and pop, and what they want is what I like to do. It has negatives, but it's also a chance to redirect my resume from its unfortunate recessionary detour, and God willing, find a place that suits until I can retire, when I'm 80. Just kidding. Sort of.

And, just to make life a little more interesting, there is a fair chance that TS Erika will become Category 1 Hurricane Erika and hit Florida early next week. It's still fluid, it may not happen, but we are in the "Cone of Uncertainty."

How very apt.


Anonymous said...

M'ship of the Smithsonian for 8 bucks a year - I wouldn't be offended either !! Here in NSW (I don't know about the other States) Ernst and I could have a car EACH in individual names, and the registrations would be free for us, as pensioners. And the same department renews our Drivers Licences for the same exorbitant fee! Mind you, that is definitely the most generous government department we have here. Councils and utility companies usually offer small discounts.

A decent job, within a decent commuting range - keeping fingers crossed for you. In your skill area, they are possibly finding that the youngsters just won't bother with the finer details, which of course, for a canny boss makes the older, more experienced, and more detail-savvy applicants look a lot younger than their years.

Best of luck with that,

Gae, in Callala Bay

Linda said...

You and I are about the same age, same profession, same omg the job sucks. I'm looking too, but the age thing is scary. It's encouraging that headhunters are looking at you. Gives the rest of us hope!