Sunday, December 27, 2015

Let's Get Real.

I'm relieved that Christmas is over. It was fun, but it was a lot of work leading up to a day that passed way too quickly. I'm ready to begin taking stock of my life and my goals for 2016.

First getting real: I haven't been taking care of myself at all lately. I'm not eating right, I'm drinking too much wine, I'm not exercising. My uber-healthy plant based diet slipped into semi-healthy, then occasionally healthy, and I am sure that's what has affected my energy level. I like my new job, but I am definitely a desk bound research wonk now, and I'm not getting a healthy amount of exercise. It certainly has completely stalled the scale. I've lost the same four pounds over and over. This isn't a mystery. I know exactly what I'm doing, or rather not doing, to get these non-results. And the reality is, I'm not 35 anymore! I'm not even 55 anymore! (And boy, does that ever blow my mind.) I can't screw around like this, this isn't penalty free - deterioration now may be forever. This isn't about wearing a size 6, it's about being fit and strong and flexible, able to ride bikes and roller coasters and have FUN! I don't want to get too old and sedentary to have fun!

Time to get back to basics: count calories, track exercise, eat healthy, move more. I taunted myself this evening, unzipping the garment bags that hold the pretty dresses that don't fit, the jackets that don't button, the pants that saw me in half now. I spent the entire summer of my non-work time in two pair of shorts, that are now on the verge of falling apart. I own other shorts. I seem to recall at the beginning of the summer, swearing that I would fit into those perfectly nice, not at all raggedy shorts in my dresser drawer. It never happened.

Taking inventory of my life: I'm lazy. I have a lot of ideas and suck on follow through. If the road to hell is paved with good intentions, mine is paved with jewelry making supplies, nail polish in a drawer, shorts that don't fit, a yoga mat that is probably a home to a spider or two by now. A loom in a bag in a closet, a yarn stash, and on and on. And on. It's embarrassing, which is why I am making this a public statement: This year, I will DO the things I think about doing, use the craft supplies that occupy many, many plastic tubs, unroll that damn yoga mat, DO all the things I keep planning to get around to "someday." Waiting for "someday" hasn't worked out so well. This IS "someday."


KatyaR said...

I'm in the same boat. I've gained over 10 pounds back in the last two months or so due to stress. Right before Christmas I got so stressed out from work and working 11-12 hours days that my blood pressure was through the roof, and I still don't feel well. It's better, but still not back to normal. I've not been working out at all and eating whatever's set in front of me. Oh, and I have a new obsession--Nutella, thanks to a coworker. I'm doing a bit better on eating since I'm at home over the holidays, but I'm still eating a lot of crap, and I'm not being good about tracking what I eat, either. All of that stops this week. I have to get back on the wagon. I did not work my ass off for a year to lose 70 pounds and then gain it back for no good reason at all. I've sworn to myself that I will not buy one bit of clothing again until I lose some of this weight. Considering most of the clothes I have are summer clothes and it's currently 32 degrees and snowing out, this could be a problem, but I hope it makes me get my act together. I'm really angry with myself. And yeah, the fact that I'm getting older every day doesn't make me feel very good, either.

Let's hope both of us have a much better new year!

wednesday said...

Exercise is not my problem, it's letting the exercise justify eating crap. Got to stop that, or soon a marathon a day won't keep the weight off.

My sister recommended a book that's free right now on Amazon, called Better! Self Help for the Rest of Us by Terry Lancaster. I think you'd enjoy it, the author is chunky (but less so than before) funny and foul-mouthed. It's sort of the polar opposite of The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up.

besshaile said...

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